A Bit Injured
by J3D13
Summary: Today was a just another pit stop on the long, hard journey my kids took to find new and inventive ways to hurt themselves. And I, in turn, would have to find new and inventive first aid techniques. Warning: Spanking. Don't like, don't read.


**A/N: **Hi! This is just a one-shot I wrote to keep the writing juices flowing while I finish up the next chapter of EBG. Hope you like it. This was written all at once and late at night so please forgive the mistakes.

**A Bit Injured**

"Ow, ow," Emmett moaned from his seat on my office couch, his curled palm tucked protectively against his chest.

"Now, Emmett, how am I supposed check your injury if you won't let me see it?" I reasoned patiently.

Behind me his brother stood against my desk, watching the exchange with acute curiosity.

We'd been in this office for nearly five minutes and I'd yet to see what the fuss was all about.

"But it hurts," my son protested. I moved closer to get a better look, but he hissed and leaned back further into the couch. "No, don't touch it."

I stopped and looked over my shoulder with a questioning look to my middle child. Jasper quickly became interested in something on the floor.

"What happened?" I asked.

Guilty silence.

I swiped a hand over my face warily. I thought I could leave the boys to themselves while I filed some paper work. I knew I should have sent them shopping with the rest of the family.

"Well, I don't smell burning flesh," I continued. "Am I safe to assume you two weren't setting each other on fire?"

"No, Dad," Emmett shook his head. "We aren't that crazy. Besides, we used up last year's supply of roman candles."

"We don't know where you hid the lighters either," Jasper piped up.

"And with good reason, boys. Clearly," I said. "Emmett, will you please let me see your hand? I promise I'll be as gentle as possible."

"I'm not ready yet. Give me a minute. It kills."

"Does it hurt worse than the time you punched a hole in the television set?" His younger brother asked. " 'Cause you hollered a lot then too."

"Way worse!" Emmett pouted. "And don't remind me."

"So that's what happened," I surmised. "Emmett lost a video game championship and got electrocuted destroying the system."

"No, Dad."

"I wish he would punch a hole through my PS4," Jasper snorted. "I'd show him pain."

Emmett answered him with a scoff that quickly turned into a groan. "It's not burnt or shocked. Something's stuck in it."

"Stuck?" I had no idea what the boy was talking about. Our skin was like marble. What he have possibly got stuck in his hand?

Jasper stepped forward. "Show him already, you big baby. He's gonna find out sooner or later. It's not like you got your finger ripped off or anything."

"Shut up, Jasper," Emmett whined. "You're the one that did this to me."

"Did not. You're the one that dragged me to the garage."

"The garage?" I parroted, my mind spinning with each new piece of ridiculous information. "What were you boys fooling around with in the garage? Emmett, give me your hand."

Emmett whimpered and brought his knees up to his chest. His converse sneakers peeked out from underneath his protective ball. "No."

I sighed, squatting so that boy and I were fact to face. "Emmett Dale, answer me this. When you became injured why did you come runnning up to this office bellowing for me?"

Emmett fixed me with puppy dog eyes. "Because it hurts and I want you to fix it."

I nodded and stretched my hand out face up. "Then let me see your hand so I can heal you."

"Nuh Uh," he shook his head rapidly.

"Why not?"

"It's gonna piss you off."

I paused. "More than likely. Would you rather I be angry for a while, or go through the rest of your life with only one working hand?"

Emmett thought about this for a few moments. "Alright," he said reluctantly, uncurling himself. "But don't touch it yet."

I lifted both my hands in a placating gesture.

Emmett slowly untucked his palm and held it out for me to see.

I immediately recognized the object embedded in his palm. The tip of a diamond coated drill bit. My new diamond sealed BOSH drill bit to be exact. I could see where they top of the bit had snapped in two under the pressure. I imagined it and a very damaged power drill were still lying on the garage floor.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. "You let Jasper drill your hand?"

"He told me to do it," Jasper protested, coming forward for a closer look. "I didn't think it'd break the skin. Wow, that's in there deep."

"It was a bet," Emmett protested weakly. He hissed as I grabbed his wrist gently. "I didn't think it would hurt like this and I was gonna win 300 bucks. Don't touch it!"

"I'm not touching it," I said absently as I examined it from all angles.

This is what I got for leaving teenage vampires to their own devices during summer vacation. Thank God Esme was with the other children or I might have had to deal with a couple of 'fainting spells' as well.

"The bit's pretty small," I reported. " I don't see any venom leaking. Hopefully the injury is only superficial."

"Dad, please get it out!" Emmett began to panic. "It seriously hurts!"

"Alright, sport." I ran a soothing hand over through his hair. "I'll have you patched up soon. Trust me."

"Anything I can do, Pa?" Jasper asked.

I supposed he was feeling badly about using a power drill on his brother now that he saw the damage he'd caused.

"Yes," I said. "Go down to the garage and get me the pliers."

"Pliers?" Emmett yelped, scooting away from be and back to the couch. "No way! Dad!"

"Calm down, Emmett," I said. "I need something strong enough to grab onto the metal in your palm."

"Yeah, Em," Jasper added. "This ain't no ordinary splinter. It's not like Dad can get it out with a needle or tweezers."

"No way, no way, no way," Emmett chanted to himself as he drew back into his protective ball. "No way are they coming at me with pliers. I'm not about that life."

While he was distracted, I sent Jasper down with a nod of my head. I slowly sat on the couch next to my big bear cub.

"Sport," I spoke as I rubbed his shoulder in comfort. "You know you have to get it out sooner or later. Who knows what kind of reaction the metal will have with your venom if you leave it in."

"I don't want you to use the pliers, Carlisle," Emmett moaned. "My hand hurts enough without someone yanking and pulling on it like old plumbing."

I shook my head as Jasper crept quietly back into the room. "You're afraid of pliers but not of drilling your own hand."

"Well, now I know it hurts," Emmett argued.

"Tex," I held my hand out and Jasper placed the instrument in my hands. "Sorry, son, but it has to be done."

Emmett held out. "It's okay. I kind of like my hand like this. Gives it character."

"Emmett-"

"No. You'll rip my skin off or something."

Jasper stood over us. "Man up, son. Need me to help you hold him down, Pa?"

I gave my middle son a look. "That won't be necessary, Jasper." I turned to my boy in need. "Emmett you trust me, don't you?"

Emmett bit his lip then nodded. "Yes, sir."

"And you know I'd never do anything to hurt you..."

"Yes, sir."

"Then belive me when I say I'm going to make this as quick and painless as possible, alright?"

Emmett blew out a huge breath. "Fine. Just do it quick." He thrust his palm out and squeezed his eyes shut.

I held his wrist. "Wait," Jasper stopped me as he dug in his pocket. "Before you take it out. Let me get my phone out."

"Your phone?" Emmett asked, eyes still shut.

"Yeah, I want to send a picture of your drilled hand to Alice."

I put the pliers down long enough to swat at Jasper's thigh with the back of my hand. He yelped and danced away. It took me a second to locate the little bugger again. I eased the pliers down, the bulky clamps making it difficult to get it around the tiny piece of metal. Emmett tensed. Thankfully vampires had keen eye sight. I didn't imagine I'd get Emmett to sit down for a second round of this if I missed. Giving one last check to make sure I hadn't pinched any skin, I have the bit a firm yank.

Emmett yelped as the metal was loosed from his palm. Venom pooled where the bit had dug in. I held the pesky object between my finger tips. As soon as I released his wrist, Emmett brought his entire hand to his mouth, sucking on the injured site.

I held the damaged bit out to Jasper. "Dispose of this please while I wrap Emmett's hand."

Jasper grimaced as it was placed in his hands. "Gross."

"Thanks, Dad," Emmett smiled as I put the bandage on. "I bet I'll heal up in no time. By the way, Jasper, you still owe me 300 hundred bucks."

That reminded me. Now that the boy was patched up, I was allowed to be properly frustrated with his stupidity.

Since I was already sitting next to him on the couch it took little effort to flip him over my lap. "300 bucks for a hole in your hand, Emmett."

Emmett squawked and kicked his legs. "Dad! Ow!"

"I thought it went without saying that we do not drill things into our hands, boy!" I scolded as I brought my hand down hard. "What possessed you to let your brother use a power drill on your own skin?!"

"'M sorry," Emmett yipped. "It was stupid. Ouch!"

"That 300 dollars is going to towards the cost of the bit and the drill you broke."

"Yes,sir! I'll pay it back."

"Yes, you will. You and your brother. And I want you to remember how stupid and _painful_ this was," I landed a final smack. "The next time you think about trying one of these stunts."

"Yes, sir," Emmett sniffled as I let him up. "Great, now my butt hurts almost as much as my hand."

"Good."

I shook my head as my son rubbed his hind end. Today was a just another pit stop on the long exciting journey my kids took to find new and inventive ways to hurt themselves. And I in turn would have to find new and inventive first aid techniques.Thankfully, it was only the drill they used. I could only imagine what they might have done with my buzz saw.

Jasper had already started to back away but I called him before he could reach the door.

"Oh, no, you don't. You're next buckaroo."

"Aw, Pa! Why me?"

"Because you can't drill a hole in your brother without getting bit yourself."

The End.


End file.
